Posted by: Jeremiah Graves | July 17, 2012

Caption Contest

If this cartoon seems familiar, that’s because it’s pretty famous, in a pop culture kinda way, that is.

It was waaaaaaaaaaaay back in 1998 when y’all first saw the above cartoon featured in an episode of Seinfeld that was aptly-titled, “The Cartoon.”

The premise was that Elaine—like most people—found a cartoon in the New Yorker to be largely incomprehensible. She was so miffed by it that she went down to the New Yorker where she confronted the editor who admitted he too didn’t understand it and had only published it because he “liked the kitty.”

This led to the editor giving Elaine the opportunity to submit her own cartoon to the magazine.


Well, because it was a ‘90s sitcom and that’s how things worked back then…or something.

Anyway, the cartoon at the top of the page is what she eventually came up with after toiling away all night.

Despite her own beaming pride, her cartoon didn’t receive the praise she’d anticipated from Jerry and Kramer.

In fact, they both had their own ideas for a better punchline:

Although it received a rather lackluster response from her friends, Elaine’s comic—with her less-than-revered punchline—is eventually published in the New Yorker, but we later learn that she ripped it off from an old Ziggy comic.

That’s the basic premise in a nutshell.

It always bugged me that she kept her rather unfunny punchline when she could have come up with something better. Heck, Kramer’s “my wife is a slut” was a fine alternative for an amusing issue to bring to the complaint window. Alas, “I wish I was taller” was the final word on the subject.

Until now, that is.

Nearly 15 years after the fact, the New Yorker is giving you a chance to write your own caption for the cartoon with the punchline you feel it’s always warranted.

As an added bonus, if they dig your entry, it’ll be published in the magazine!!

I’m not going to enter, because I’m not that funny and because I’ve fumbled around the site and can’t seem to figure out how to enter.

As such, I’m going to rip-off their idea completely and open it up all y’all, My Faithful Readers.

The contest will be open until midnight (EST) on Sunday, July 22nd. I’ll pick my three favorites—assuming I get enough entries to do so—and then we’ll let the “Blank Stares and Blank Pages” community vote on a winner.

The winner will receive an amazing surprise prize package consisting of lots of random things from my apartment!!

So hit up the comments section and start entering your punchlines today.



  1. That kid is on the f’n escalator again!!!!


  2. “The only good I’ll ever do for the world is bacon.”


  3. “My spider keeps writing fat jokes in her web”


  4. “I can’t tell if people love me for me, or because I’m bacon.”


  5. How about:

    Hawgs ‘R Us is false advertising. All I find are friggin’ motorcycles and I was expecting a meat market. Where’s the ladies, yo?


    It’s insulting to me when people call cops pigs.


    If human meat tastes like pork, why don’t you just become cannibals and leave us alone?


    • Too bad the deadline has come and gone, those were pretty good and I laughed out loud at the second one.

      You coulda been a contenda!


      • Ah, well, it’s nice to know you enjoyed them anyway!


  6. […] The moment you’ve all undoubtedly been waiting for is finally here, it’s time to announce the winner of the last month’s caption contest. […]


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