Posted by: Jeremiah Graves | March 18, 2012

Birds Continue Their Reign of Terror

It’s not a big secret that I hate birds.

A quick trip through the archives here shows how birds have wronged me in many ways over the years.

Whether it is playing mind games, physically assaulting me, publicly humiliating me, haunting my dreams, or attempting to destroy the modern world…birds are seemingly always going out of their way to prove that they suck.

Today, I present to you, My Faithful Readers, further proof that birds are complete and total assholes:

What the shit is this bird’s deal?

The cat is just hanging out and the bird keeps trying to mount him like he’s freakin’ Seabiscuit.

He’s just lucky that this cat seems pretty chill—and/or uncomfortable with a talon around his neck—and is willing to put up with this parrot’s bullshit.

If a bird tried to play that game with Honey, she’d have the sumbitch disemboweled faster than it could squeak out “Polly wanna cracker…”

Yeah, birds are total assholes.

(Hat tip to: Buzzfeed for the video.)



  1. This bird has a crazy look in his eye!


  2. I hate the birds that shit all over my car as soon as I have it washed. Never fails.


    • Further proof that birds simply cannot be trusted.

      They’re vindictive sumbitches!


  3. Clearly the bird was trying to find the best way cuddle with the cat…lesson learned it is hard to cuddle with out arms.


  4. The real question here is why is this bird still alive. Cat should ALWAYS trump bird.


    • I know, right?!

      This bird is lucky that he stumbled upon the most chill cat I have ever seen.

      A legit angry cat would have ripped his beak off and shoved it up his tail feather.


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