Posted by: Jeremiah Graves | December 15, 2011

More Reasons I’m Not Ready for Children

It’s no secret that I’m not ready for children.

I’ve previously blogged about some of my fears and trepidation regarding having children and I think it’s pretty obvious that being responsible for another human life is some pretty scary stuff.

I’m just really not there yet.

That having been said, lately I have stumbled across some things that make parenting seem awesome.

I mean, obviously there’s the whole “I love my kid” thing and blah-blah-blah, yadda-yadda-yadda…but I’m talking about the fun you can have messing with tiny people with brains that are only half-formed.

Seriously, did you know that kids are super gullible?

Like, they’ll believe damn near anything you tell them. If it comes from mom or dad, it’s law. It’s amazing. They don’t even take the time to go out and do any fact-checking.

It’s like, come on, Junior…you’ve had a smartphone since you came out of the womb, just Google that shizzle.

Anyway, here are two prime examples that I’ve encountered recently.

The first is a comic from the fine folks over at Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal:

Seriously, how awesome was that?!

It’s like you can either give ‘em the real scoop or you can totally prank ’em and they’ll go along with it, no questions asked.

I mean, obviously, the kid is either going to figure it out in time or you’ll tell ‘em yourself, but the opportunities to pull these kinds of pranks are out there by the buttload every day.

The second example is this YouTube video that made me laugh until I nearly peed, you know, because I’m a jerk:

How great was that?!

Little dude finds out mom and dad have made a full-on, Ric Flair-style heel turn and they’re rootin’ for the Red Wings and he absolutely loses his shit.

You can just torture kids with something so tiny and inconsequential and then like thirty seconds later, when he’s all ready to burn the house down and run off into the woods, you can be all “nah…I’m just kidding, Slugger…go Penguins!” and he’s over it.

Hell, even if the little dude was still pissed off, you could hook him up with some ice cream or a maybe a can of Coke he’d be your best friend again. No harm, no foul.

Man, kids are awesome.



  1. Hahaha!! That was hilarious! I’m going to have start using this tact soon.


  2. […] given a couple of shout-outs to the folks at “Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal” for their always entertaining comics, but […]


  3. […] made this point pretty clear a couple of different times in the […]


  4. […] In fact, I’ve made it pretty clear that I am somewhat frightened at the very prospect of someday being a parent. […]


  5. […] I realize that I’ve been very adamant over the years that I’m not ready for kids in any sense of the word and that the mere thought of having a daughter flat-out scares the piss […]


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