Love is a Battlefield: Taylor Swift vs Zooey Deschanel

My Faithful Readers, it has finally happened…Taylor Swift has been bitten by the jealousy bug and she’s ready to fight for my affection.

Taylor Swift has been the apple of my eye for quite some time now and if you’ve visited this blog a time or two (or three or four or five or six or seven) before, you’re well-aware of my affinity for the flaxen-haired country crooner.

Over the years this relationship has seemed very one-sided, but that appears to have changed this morning. That’s right folks, it seems that Taylor has fired her first salvo in what figures to be a vicious battle for my heart.

You see, earlier this week another of my celebrity crushes, Zooey Deschanel, announced that she was getting divorced from Death Cab for Cutie frontman, Ben Gibbard.

This undoubtedly caught Taylor’s eye as Zooey has been mentioned as the object of my affection in a previous post or two (or three or four or…well, you get the idea).

If that wasn’t enough to get Taylor’s hackles up, Zooey—knowing she was just mere days from filing her divorce papers—fired the first shot in this war of attrition affection when she showed up at game four of the World Series (undoubtedly aware I’d be watching at home) and belted the crap outta the “Star-Spangled Banner” wearing, well, this:

I know, right?!

She’s hot enough to melt your damned teeth right outta your head, ain’t she?

Anyway, now that Zooey is single and ready to mingle it seems that Taylor is a little on edge about losing the attention of her favorite goony-looking Iowan.

As such, she went ahead and posted this picture on her Facebook fan page this morning:

Taylor knows I love me some cats and she’s doing everything in her power to keep me under her spell like the crafty minx that she is.

I dig this. I dig it a lot.

We’ve got what figures to be a rapidly escalating battle for my heart going on here ladies and gentlemen. I mean, obviously that’s what’s going on.

So here we are folks, the battle is raging on and the ball is back in Zooey’s court following Taylor’s feline counter-offensive move this morning.

If Zooey wants to fire back in a big way, she should really take advantage of the McRibs’ return or maybe look into using her connections with FOX to snag me some World Series tickets or something…but I don’t want to put ideas in anyone’s head.

I’ll let the ladies figure this out themselves.