Posted by: Jeremiah Graves | December 15, 2009

Welcome to the Cool Kids Club

I finally feel like I belong.

Tonight, I gained a bad-ass two-wheeler just like many of my biker friends.

My biker friends are of the ten-speed variety, not the Harley kind.

They’re essentially the same except with less tattoos and fewer leather jackets.

Anyway, I’m officially a part of the biking inner circle…sorta.

You see, I don’t exactly have a “bike” per se, I have um…well…it’s a Razor scooter.

That’s right, my Faithful Readers, as of tonight, I am the proud owner of a Razor scooter. Apparently this bad-boy was left behind in the Hayden lost and found for eons and tonight it was bequeathed to me.

As such, I finally feel like I belong with my biking peeps.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I realize that a Razor scooter is like the inbred stepchild of the bike world, but I’m cool with that. I’m not ashamed.

Okay that’s a lie, I’m a little ashamed.

I only rode the scooter home because it was after 2am and pitch black, although I did manage to come across a biker who gave me a double-take and an obvious scoff.

The worst, however, was that I came across exactly what I hoped to avoid, a pack of teenagers.

I was in the final leg of my trip home, less than a block from my front door when a pack of puberty-stricken adolescents were sauntering down the street in front of me.

Being the cool-headed dude that I am, I just kept on scootin’ toward my destination, only to hit a big crack in the road that sent me flying and the scooter whipping around behind me.

I landed on my feet, albeit whilst stumbling forward like an idiot and the scooter whipped around and bashed me in the shins.

As one might expect, the entire pack of angst-filled demons laughed and laughed and made fun of my scooter.

I did what any bad-ass scooter rider would do and I hopped right back on and glided the rest of the way home, just like I was riding on a cloud.

Mock my ride all you want, but I’ve got a sweet-ass set of wheels and a fresh, new membership into the cool kids club now that I’m riding on two wheels, just like all my cool bike friends.

Hells yes.

I finally belong!!

PS: I’ve named her Jasmine.


  1. JEALOUS!! I’ve wanted a Razor scooter for years. Ride that thing proudly, my friend!


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