Posted by: Jeremiah Graves | April 17, 2009

My Nose is Not Happy

sneeze001So I’ve determined that I’ve either got a basic head cold or I’m developing allergies.

It’s hard to tell exactly which it is.

I almost never get sick, but the lovely Ms. Bethanie Edwards (soon to be Pinkus!) was sharing her nasally delights with the entire processing office earlier in the week, so it’s entirely possible I caught whatever it was that made her sound like Smurfette all day Tuesday.

Although, since I never get sick it could be allergies, which would be a new frontier for me.

I’ve heard that a lot of people don’t develop allergies until their roarin’ twenties, so it’s very possible that’s the case.

That would sorta suck considering how much I’ve made fun of Grace about her allergies over the years. I guess that’d be a swift kick to the pills from karma, huh?!

Either way be it allergies or a head cold, something is definitely amiss. In the last two days I’ve sneezed roughly 63 times. This is a pretty big deal because I think prior to that I’d sneezed a grand total of eight times my entire life.

No, seriously…ask around. Almost no one has ever seen me sneeze until recently. In fact, in the few instances I have sneezed it tends to leave people frightened and/or confused. True story.

Anyway…since I don’t know what’s going on in my noggin, I don’t exactly know how to diagnose it to make it go away. I’ve got a runny nose, but I’m stuffed up, being stuffed up is giving me watery eyes and some weird pressure in my face that I’m quite unaccustomed to…oh yeah and I’m sneezing like crazy!!

So I dug through Grace’s various remedies and found two that seemed to fit the bill…sort of.

One box said it would it would stop my runny nose and watery eyes.

The other box said it would take care of the congestion, pressure and sneezing.

The thing is…I can’t help but think that they’ll sorta cancel each other out. If one is to get my nose-a-runnin’ to stop the congestion and the other is to stop the runny nose in its tracks, wouldn’t that just get me all congested again?!

Not knowing which one was the right way to go, I just took two of each and we’ll see how that works itself out. I’m sure there won’t be any ill-effects from this decision.

On an unrelated note, everything has a blue-hue and smells like beets. Weird.



  1. Try this quiz out:

    However, I don’t claim to know the difference between a moist cough and an ordinary one (see question 10).


  2. Thanks for the quiz, Kathy!

    According to the fine folks at Ladies Home Journal, I simple have a cold and I am not developing allergies.



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