Posted by: Jeremiah Graves | February 4, 2009

Punch ‘em in the Face


So I just booked a ticket on Midwest Airlines. I was all excited because this ticket is for what is becoming an annual pilgrimage to the frigid Midwest for our fantasy baseball draft and—since everyone is incessant about getting hitched—a little bachelor party action. In addition, I get to see my family and go to the Twins final home opener in the Metrodome!! All-in-all it makes for a pretty bad-ass trip.

I’ve flown on Midwest airlines one other time, last year’s Draft/Bachelor Party/Family/Twins Game weekend. It was a pretty nice flight on a rather tiny airline. The highlight was that they handed out warm chocolate chip cookies. The downfall was that as a rather tiny airline, they seem to have a lot of issues.

On my flight to Minneapolis last year, they had to call the plane back to the gate for my connecting flight in Milwaukee to let like fifteen of us on a flight that was already leaving the gate because they were completely unaware that so many of the people on my Boston to Milwaukee flight were connecting to Minneapolis. “COMPLETELY UNAWARE” they say to me. Gotta be honest, that scares me just a little bit. If you’re completely unaware that half the passengers on your plane pulling away from the gate aren’t onboard yet, because they’re on another of your airline’s flights…what else aren’t you aware of?! Do I even want to know?!

Then on the way back to Boston, they didn’t know where their plane was that was supposed to connect us from Milwaukee to Boston. That’s right…they said, “we don’t know where the airplane is.” Those were their exact words. Eventually they discovered the plane, it was somewhere over the Rockies and we all had to hold up until it got there.

I got stranded in the Milwaukee airport for nearly six hours. Do you know what six hours in the Milwaukee airport is like?! Imagine being at some relative’s place where there is nothing to do but sit and stare out the window or re-read the book you’ve already finished. But that’s not all; you’re surrounded by a bunch of airport groupies at the lone eatery/bar in the airport. They’re all giggling like crazy at re-runs of “America’s Funniest Home Videos” from the early ‘90s.

Well…Midwest has wronged me once more. I just booked the flight and when they emailed me my itinerary it wasn’t the same as what I’d booked. No, no…they’d screwed up my departure time from Boston. Instead of leaving on the 11:20am to Milwaukee with a half-hour layover…I’m now leaving on the 6:55am to Milwaukee with a nearly FIVE-HOUR layover.

To change the reservation now would cost me another $100 and I can’t afford that, I could barely afford the ticket itself, let alone the cost of modifying it.

Ugh…well, I guess I better pack a couple of extra books and charge up the iPod to drown out the incessant laughter from the airport groupies.

…that or I could start drinking when I land at 8:30?! Who knows, maybe by the time I get on my plane to Minneapolis at 1:20 in the PM, I’ll be an airport groupie too?!



  1. So dude, I might be able to help with internet no guarantee but I’ll send yah instructions to get set up, and how you know if you can surf. It will be free but slow. 🙂

    Don’t worry I’ll do pictures and step by steps


  2. You should never, ever EVER bring just one book. I don’t think I ever travel with fewer than three, and I usually take as many as 5. And then buy at least three while I’m at wherever I’m going.

    I mean, seriously though, multiples are just good planning! What if you lose one, or finish it earlier than expected, or get stuck in an airport-snowdrift/long line? What if you start one and just don’t like it???? I mean seriously!! Mulitple books are just necessary! Traveling with just one is like traveling with just one pair of socks, or forgetting a toothbrush…. both of which I may have done. On multiple occasions.

    But just one book! COME ON!


  3. […] morning I am getting ready to head out to the airport and catch my botched flight to Milwaukee where I can hopefully snag a standby flight to avoid spending a very long, very […]


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