So there I was wandering into work.
I was doing the whole penguin-waddle thing because it’s icier than Angelina Jolie’s husband-stealing heart outside today and it seems that Boston/Cambridge is pretty much tapped out as far as combating winter goes.
I was shuffling my way through the intersection just before the stoplight was about to change and then—like three feet behind me—I hear this loud crashing noise.
I turn around to discover that some van just totally bashed into a tiny car and then tried to haul ass, but spun out on the ice in the intersection and ended up turned around with nowhere to go but head-on into the car it had already hit. I suppose, if he was feeling really ballsy he could try and pull some sort of crazy stunt and whip the van into reverse and haul ass toward Mass Ave gliding backwards on a sheet of ice.
Luckily, he wasn’t a complete dumb-ass and he just gave up and put it in park while patiently waiting for a verbal onslaught from the driver of the tiny car.
Somewhere amidst all the chaos, I realized that I had been roughly one midget’s length away from getting all-kinds of destroyed by some rogue van driver with no respect for the conditions of the road.
…then I slipped and fell on my ass.