Posted by: Jeremiah Graves | December 16, 2007

Dear Diary (v.2:pt.2)

Part 2 of volume 2 picks up on my return to my cube after snagging some food. If you have yet to read part 1…now would be a wise time to do so for chronological purposes of course.


Saturday – 8:54pm

That was quite refreshing. The gym was super empty and I even got to kick it in the sauna. Which was just dandy until some dude came in and was all like flopping his man-parts right in front of me while drying off from his shower?! Quite the odd way to dry off…by going into a sweat box, but hey who am I to judge?!

I snagged a big, greasy slice of pepperoni pizza which was delicious. I did, however, have to stand at the counter for 10 minutes waiting for service while the chickadee behind the register was chit-chatting on her cell-phone. Some other friendly young woman beside me had been waiting for her order for nearly 20 minutes and was getting quite steamed. As such, I asked what she had ordered that was taking so long…apparently she had ordered a grilled cheese sammitch. That’s right, a grilled cheese. Two pieces of bread. Cheese. Butter. Heat. Done. Period. It takes like 3 minutes to make a grilled cheese and this lovely young co-ed had been waiting for 20 minutes. I recommended that she give them a piece of her mind. Little did I know that she was bat-shit crazy. As I was walking away with my pizza she started screaming like a straight-up whack-job and threatened to go in the back and make the sammitch herself. I didn’t stick around to see how all that worked out, but I’m pretty sure she got her grilled cheese.

While eating my pizza I watched as a literal parade of MIT students walked up to a set of locked doors, with the hours of operation written on them and all took their turn yanking and pulling on the locked doors confused out of their minds as to why they couldn’t get in. It makes me happy to know that it doesn’t just happen at the libraries.

After I’d finished my pizza I went to get some overnight reserves. A cold sammitch, two energy drinks, some orange juice and cookies. I also got a sub that was ridiculously awful. For the first time in my life I wasn’t able to finish a sammitch. It was that bad. I only got 3/4 of it down before I was worried I’d start to hurl if I ate anymore. When I can’t finish it…that’s when you know you’ve made a bad sammitch. Although given some of the alternatives (see: picture) in the market it was probably a fine decision.

Now here I sit, with roughly one hour left until the overnight shift officially starts and I can feel a little case of the sleepy-sleep hanging out back behind my eyes…but I’m hanging in there.

Saturday – 9:25pm

Huh…it’s National Cupcake Day! How ‘bout that?!

Door Count #1 – 10:30 – 99 people

Saturday – 10:39pm

Okay then, I’m less than an hour into the actual “overnight” portion of my day and I’m super tired. That can’t be a good sign. I popped a couple of No Doze about an hour ago and noticed no positive reaction. Holy crap, that dude has awful facial hair…I realize that’s one heck of a statement coming from a dude who looks like a prepubescent hormonally imbalanced freak thanks to this weird, patchy Abraham Lincoln thing I got going on…but whatevs. It’s some awful facial hair.

Saturday – 10:58pm

Two nerds were just arguing about batteries. They went back and forth about who could get them cheaper. In the end nerd one was begging nerd two to bring back a suitcase full of AA batteries from Los Angeles after Christmas Break.

Literally, begging. ‘Tis a sad, sad thing to watch.

Saturday – 11:09pm

Aw suki suki!! The first real incident of the evening has taken place…some dude was looking at something, probably porn—let’s be honest, and f’d up the computer. It started playing loud music and the dude grabbed his shit and bolted for the door, but not before yanking out the cable for the monitor so no one could see what he was looking at. Unfortunately, some would-be do-gooder went ahead and turned the computer off to kill the annoying music before we could plug the monitor back in and see just what that dude’s website of choice was for the evening. Hot damn, things are heating up!

Saturday – 11:23pm

Oh when it rains it pours baby! Some dude who didn’t have his MIT ID just came in. Once we switch to overnight hours you need your MIT ID to get in…otherwise you get booted. This dude just vultured the door and slipped in when someone else was leaving and then Greg “The Enforcer” Padilla, my partner-in-crime for this evening’s festivities, was on him like grease on a Big Mac, which is to say all-up-in his grill. The dude tweaked out—and probably justifiably so—and went as far as to use the phrase “it’s just a fucking library!” It is great stuff, however, “The Enforcer” wasn’t having it and showed that punk to the door.

PS: Still really sleep with 10 and a half hours left! :-/

Door Count #2 – 11:30pm – 102 people

Saturday – 11:37pm

I used my Microsoft Paint prowess to put myself in a picture with my newest celebrity crush, Amy Adams and in a picture with my two lovely blonde heroes Veronica Mars and Cheerleader. 🙂

Sunday – 12:10am

So apparently Miriam-Webster chose “w00t” as the word of the year. There are so many feelings a dude could have about that such as IDK or WTF…however, much like w00t those aren’t real words either and as such one would assume unworthy of being voted the “word” of the year.

So I’ve started like six blogs at various points today ranging from baseball to my ultimate Christmas wish list to the top seven most despicable things I’d do for $5 million. Unfortunately, I haven’t found the ambition to finish any of them. Although I do still have a solid ten hours or so of work left. Perhaps I’ll find some ambition in the wee-hours of the morning.

Door Count #3 – 12:30am – 78 People

Sunday – 12:52am

Okay, I’m getting a wonderful rush right now that I’m assuming is my second-wind. Usually during an overnight I get anywhere from four to sixteen “second-winds” so it should be intriguing to see how long this one lasts.

We lost a lot of people in the last hour or so. Oh wait…wait, here comes a nerd now. He’s making direct eye-contact…its question time, baby!

Sunday – 1:06am

Ah yes! Nerdy McSpectacles just lived up to my expectations with his question. Let me give you a play-by-play of our brief, yet magical, encounter.

Nerd: Hi, sir…can I ask you a question.
Me: Sure, what’s up?
Nerd: I was wondering if you have any more study rooms.
Me: Nope, I’m pretty sure it’s just those two.
Nerd: You’re sure.
Me: Like 99% sure.
Nerd: Is there an office in the back that I could work in?
Me: Um…no, those are kinda just for the staff.
Nerd: *nervously wringing hands together* Oh…
Me: Is there a problem?
Nerd: Well, I have problems with other people being around me when I study.
Me: Okay?!
Nerd: So I like to lock myself in a small room where no one can sneak up on me.
Me: Sneak up on you?! Why would someone be sneaking up on you?!
Nerd: Who knows?!
Me: Riiiiiiiiight. Perhaps the library isn’t the best place for you then?
Nerd: No, I think I’ll go back to my dorm room.
Me: Okay…have a good one.

…you can’t make that shit up!! I love this place!



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