Back in the Saddle

Good news, I survived my trip to North Carolina and had an amazing time.

Ungood news, I was back at work for no more than 15 minutes today before I was arguing with a co-worker.

I’m going to try to keep this as vague and non-descript as possible to avoid implicating said co-worker.

This particular co-worker has a tendency to argue with me and is often wrong. He/she is generally unwilling to accept this no matter how much factual information I have to back-up my claims.

In fact, here’s a quick template for roughly 83% of the arguments we’ve ever had:

Co-worker: “[Absurd statement riddled with inaccuracies].”
Cap’n Charisma: “You are wrong. You are oh-so-very wrong in every possible way. The reasons you are wrong include: [fact #1], [fact #2], and especially [fact #3].”
Co-worker: “Nah…you’re wrong.”
Cap’n Charisma: “…but, but…[FACTS]!!!”
Co-Worker: “Meh…I’m right. You’re wrong. I hate you today.”
Cap’n Charisma: *sigh*

The other 17% of our arguments go something like this:

Cap’n Charisma: “Hey, I wanted to ask you why you did [random boring library procedure] the way you did…”
Co-worker: “Why?”
Cap’n Charisma: “Well, because that’s not how you’re supposed to do [random boring library procedure] according to the instructions.”
Co-worker: “Mmmmmmhmmmmmmm…well, that’s how I do [random boring library procedure] and that’s how I’m going to keep doing [random boring library procedure] until someone tells me otherwise.”
Cap’n Charisma: “…but don’t the instructions sorta tell you otherwise?!”
Co-worker: “I don’t give a shit…I’ll do it my way.”
Cap’n Charisma: *sigh*

Today’s “welcome back” argument fell right into the first category and had to do with he/she telling me repeatedly that [vague library thing] didn’t exist. I know this to be false, because not only did I create [vague library thing], but I have—on numerous occasions—used [vague library thing] and have references to [vague library thing] on [decidedly less-vague library thing].

Needless to say, [vague library thing] exists.

Co-worker refuses to believe that it does. Apparently, co-worker has stopped doing parts of his/her job as a result of his/her being “unaware” of the existence of [vague library thing], but hasn’t asked anyone about it or anything. Nope, instead of wondering why part of his/her job just went away, he/she just sorta stopped altogether like it was no biggy.

It’s a good thing I didn’t win the lottery and stay on vacation forever, that would have been just the worst.