I’ve written a lot about my encounters with library crazies over the years.
I’ve told countless tales from the battlefields. I’ve written some open letters. I’ve compared them to zombies. I’ve threatened their lives. I’ve included some of my equally crazy/annoying co-workers in on the fun. I’ve attempted to clear up any confusion regarding what libraries can and cannot do.
I’ve even profiled a small sampling of the many types of library crazies.
What I haven’t done, however, is take the amount of time and effort one would need to put in to create an exhaustive list of the various breeds of library crazies that exist in the world.
Here’s a quick sampling of some entries:
The thing is, this guy almost never wants to argue over something worthwhile (like whether he paid his fines or not.) It’s usually the guy who swears up and down that Stephen King, instead of Dean Koontz, actually wrote Intensity. Or that we’re the ones who have his phone even though we’ve looked for it six times. Dealing with him is like being stuck in the old Monty Python “Argument Clinic” sketch.
We hope you make it to the Olympic 100 meter final one day. Just please don’t train here in the library. If we could find your mom, we’d thank her for raising an active kid, but berate her for letting him run around like a springbok while indoors.
There you go, I hooked you up with A and Z, now head over to “Prawn and Quartered” and read the rest of the entry.
You’ll be happy you did.