Posted by: Jeremiah Graves | March 18, 2010

Yahoo! Answers #001

Yahoo! Answers is an amazing website.

Not really in a good way, mind you, but more in the “holy crap, come check out what these dumb teenagers are ‘writing'” kind of way.

As such, I’ve decided to create a quasi-regular series where I post a question taken directly from one of the many future custodial engineers and/or “professional dancers” who frequent these websites.

Now, most of these questions will undoubtedly be pulled from the “Singles and Dating” section, if for no better reason than it gives us the best examples that teenagers can neither spell, punctuate, or using anything even remotely close to a complete sentence.

I’d like to make a stab at instant messaging here, but I’m fairly sure that would date me a bit. I mentioned IMing to some freshmen the other day in the library and they looked at me like I’d smoked all the crack…all of it.

Apparently instant messaging has gone the way of the dinosaur, trans fats, and the Cobra Kai Dojo.

It now seems that most children come out of the womb texting on a Blackberry equipped with one of those fancy slide-out QWERTY keyboards.

Well-played young-ins, well-played indeed.

Anyway, I appear to have gone off on sort of sleepless tangent?! Ah yes…Yahoo Answers.

I’ll be posting a “question” from Yahoo Answers and looking to you, my Faithful Readers to supply the perfect answer.

Now I’m warning you in advance, many of these “questions” are merely children rambling about pix or luv or baby-mamas and there appears to be no actual question involved.

I’ll still be looking for an answer, response, or perhaps some sort of literal translation (ooooh exciting!) from some/any/all y’all…

With that said, here’s your inaugural Quasi-Daily Dose of Yahoo! Answers…

Here be the link, just in case the screenshot is too fuzzy to read.

Let’s hear whatcha gotsta say y’all…

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Responses

  1. First, this girl does not need a boyfriend. Someone of this intellectual level should not be allowed to potentially breed. Trust me, we have enough of this type in the schools already.

    And, speaking of schools and as an educator, this is an excellent example of why social promotion is a not a good idea.

    • Ten points for being first to respond!!

      Secondly, I totally concur. If this chick reproduces, we’re all doomed.

  2. I think he does like her because he gave her a rose. You know because her friends told him too and stuff. and that is really important. Plus it sounds like he is really shy around her which means that he is totally playing up the uncomfortable around the girl he likes game.

    and finally it looks like he has lots of girlfriends but only as friends.

    • All good points.

      She really is livin’ the hard-knock life with this guy and his mixed signals.

      I mean one minute it’s a rose and some light Facebook stalking…then there’s all shy and awkwardness and wondering how old she is…

      Kids, man…kids.

  3. Holy crap thats hard to read, even for me the king of bad grammer/spelling ability.

  4. I think it’s hard to know if he likes her because we don’t know what type of rose he got her. What if it’s a white rose? Then he just wants to be friends, right? But if he gets her lots of white roses then he wants to be REALLY good friends, right?

    That’s why I think her friends should tell him to get her more roses, just to make sure he likes her because if he gets her more roses then he must really like her, right?.

    He’s got lots of girlfriends, but that’s good because then he can have more experience around her and stuff. Lots of girlfriends=good.

    I like roses

    • I just learned oh-so-very-much about you…


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