How F-ing Old Am I?!

Did y’all ever have one of those days where something very small and innocuous sets you off?!

Well, I had one of those moments the other day when I was surfing around the interwebs for Taylor Swift videos.

Given that I’ve got no MTV or VH1—not that those channels actually play music videos anymore—or CMT, I can’t remember the last time I actually saw a music video.

That having been said, I figured it’d be kinda cool to see the official videos associated with the songs I’ve been listening to on repeat for the better part of two years.

My YouTube search for Taylor Swift went swimmingly until I found this little ditty here:

First and foremost, you gotta give the dude props. Seriously, is there a better way to win over a gal who is logically out of everyone’s league than by writing a song about how you’re obsessed with her?

I think not.

Chicks—especially famous ones—love it when dudes are obsessed with ‘em…women can’t resist that stuff.

Secondly, I find it pretty amusing that this dude is looking to make a name for himself by writing a debut song called and about “Taylor Swift.”

For those who haven’t followed Taylor’s career as closely as me and the rest of the internet’s unofficial Creepy Dude Coalition have, let me clue you in here. Taylor’s very first single was entitled “Tim McGraw” and the song pretty much put her on the map.

Thirdly, back off dude. She’s mine. I called dibs, like, forever ago. DIBS, man! Respect ‘em.

Fourthly, I followed up on this song a little, because I’m a nerd and clearly have far too much access to the internet and not enough to fill my free-time, and mostly because he claims to have first heard Taylor Swift when he was just thirteen years old:

first time i heard her we were only 13
i remember where i was when she started to sing
now that were older i just wanna be seen
hangin out talkin bout the two of us

That last fact bothered me something fierce.

Upon further reading in interviews and whatnot this guy claims he “grew up” listening to Taylor Swift.

I’m pretty sure Taylor Swift has really only been around since I moved to Boston and that boggles my mind. I haven’t even lived here for four full years yet.

Yet in that time, people have grown-up on my top country music crush (sorry Ms. Underwood, you take a close second-place) and are already writing songs pining for her hand?!

How F-ing Old Am I?!

This Tyler Dean punk got me feeling like I’m 160 years old knowing that the once-upon-a-time underage songbird I crush over is now old enough to have songs written about her…

Ugh.

F-ing kids and their music.

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