Posted by: Jeremiah Graves | December 18, 2007

Dear Diary (v.3)

Hello ladies and gentlemen,

Welcome to the final installment of my overnight diary for 2007. In an attempt to keep continuity rolling, I shall refer to this little ditty as volume three…well, okay…it’s not as much for continuity sake as it is a result of my dwindling lack of creativity and humor, damn you old age, you’ve sapped all of my good qualities and replaced them with achy joints, failing bowels and a nagging desire to yell at everyone about their loud, hippy music.

Anywho…back to the third-and-final installment of 2007’s overnight diary. We’ve had some laughs, some rats, some crazy-assed nerds and all-kinds of weird quasi-voodoo stuff in between…yet here we are. It feels like just yesterday I was finishing up an overnight.

Oh wait! It was…

————————-

SUNDAY END OF OVERNIGHT-to-PRESENT

Following the end of the infamous “12-HOUR MARATHON SHIFT” (meant to be read aloud in that movie-trailer voice…you know what I’m talking about)…I made the trek back through the blistery, frozen tundra that was Southie in a blizzard…or Nor’Easter (did I get the apostrophe in the right place?) as you folks out east call it.

Unfortunately by the time I hit Southie the big, fluffy snowflakes had given way to the slightly more bad-ass tiny pellets of ice…or as I’ll forever be referring to them, Jebus bullets. So I spent my mile walk taking itty-bitty ice chunks in the face, one after another after another after another…etc…etc…etc…

When I finally made it home, through the multiple feet of snow and slush that were sitting piled on the sidewalks, and made the very Sherpa-esque climb up our stairs all I wanted to do was sleep. Unfortunately, it dawned on me…I’ve got to do that all over again tomorrow night.

As such, I formulated an incredible (read: probably mildly-retarded) game plan. In said game plan I would stay up as late as humanly possible to ensure that I sleep in as long as humanly possible the next day so that I’d be able to stay up as long as humanly possible Monday night into Tuesday morning into Tuesday afternoon.

Now I realize how horribly that entire paragraph reads out-loud…but realize…that is exactly how it sounded when I thought it at roughly the 29-hour mark on the sleepless scale. It feels like you were really there, doesn’t it?!

So I proceeded with the staying awake. I looked at the internet for a little bit before realizing that I’d been staring at the exact some content on the internet for roughly nine hours and it sorta made me want to throw-up all over Jackie’s bed. Not because I don’t like Jackie…or her bed…or her sheets or any of it really…but because I figured that eventually I’d have to pass out in my bad and when that moment came there would be no time for cleaning up vomit.

Let me stop you right there, Fictional Reader. (By-the-by…my fictional reader for the time being is Stephen King wearing Winnie-the-Pooh footy-pajamas after three Vicodin and two shots of Jag) I know what you’re thinking F.R. Why would I have to puke in anyone’s bed? Wouldn’t it be much more convenient to display my digestive pyros in the toilet? Well pa-shaw, I say to you F.R…when you’ve been up for darn near 30 hours basic logic goes straight out the window and is replaced by a combination of drunken-Frat logic, basic animal instincts and the musical works of mid-‘90s powerhouse, Ace of Base.

Anywho, after the contemplative vomiting…I decided I’d be better served to take a shower and wash off the sleepy. Needless to say, it sorta worked. I felt refreshed, clean and I smelled less like a library than I’d assumed I ever would again. It was darn near magical.

At this point the Patriots were nearing kickoff and I spent a solid chunk of time staring out the window asking myself a few simple questions:

-Where are they going to put all this freakin’ snow?
-Are they really going to play football in this crap?
-Did I remember to put on underwear after my shower?
-Can Jackie and Grace tell that I’m unsure of my current underpants situation?
-Is that my uncle Doug at Dunkin’ Donuts?
-Why is Dough in Boston?
-Why did I just think “Dough” instead of “Doug?”
-Was it because he’s entering a Dunkin’ Donuts?
-Why isn’t it spelled Doughnuts?
-Wait…was that Uncle Doug?
-How long have I been standing at this window?

Yeah…I think you get the gist. This went on for roughly ten to fifteen of—what I can only assume will prove to be—the most wasted moments of my entire lifetime. Oh wait…wait, strike that…I did watch all 95 minutes of Carrot Top’s motion picture debut “Chairman of the Board.” That will forever reign as the most wasted (and painful) moments of my entire life. (Unless they make a sequel and I am coerced into going – most likely by a terrorist faction)

After the window debacle, I settled in on the couch and watched the Patriots lay waste to the Jets in what was honestly one of the more entertaining games I’d seen all year. At halftime I called the family and listened intently doing my best not to fall asleep and I think I did a bang-up job until I hit about the 30-minute mark with my Pappy, or as I like to call him when he has a phone in his hand—Chatty Cathy. It was about then that I started slurring a little bit—not racial slurs, but rather lack of motor skills slurs—at which point he politely decided it was time we end the conversation and I take a nap. I assured him I would…I lied. My plan couldn’t be thwarted by my father playing the “I Care about My Son’s Well-Being Card”…well-played, Old Man, you’ve been a fine adversary, but I shall not slumber until nightfall.

As such, I think I ended up dozing off for all of five minutes as the game came to a close, because I opened my eyes up just in time to see the feed switch from Foxboro to Pittsburgh where the Steelers were getting bitch-slapped by the Jaguars. I spent the next half-hour or so watching the end of the other games and then decided it was time for a little football magic of my own…and perhaps another beer.

Oh yeah…I forgot to mention, that as part of my “I Want to be a Football Fan” kick that I’m currently on…I’ve found that I have a hard time watching a football game without enjoying at bare minimum one beer per quarter. So we’re talking a four-beer per game floor and a 30-beer per game ceiling. Not because that’s all I could physically shove down my throat during one game, but because I’m too Dutch to buy more than one case per game-day. As such, I had four beers through the course of the Pats game and my convo with the family.

Following the game, I started playing some vintage Madden 2004. When I play videogames I require a beverage. I didn’t have any soda or juice in the house, so that left beer. So I played a few hours of Madden and drank some more beers and before I knew it I’d had eight beers and clinched a playoff spot in the AFC. It was a good day for a dude who at this point was just hitting the 36-hour mark on the sleepless scale. On a side-note, in 2004…you could away next to nothing for Brian Westbrook. It was a straight-up steal!!

Honestly, I’m not really sure what I did for the next hour or so while I was waiting for the Sunday Night Football game to come on. Oh wait…yes, yes I do. Yahoo! Answers. F’n Yahoo! Answers!!!

I wandered through the wasteland and wreckage that is YA looking for either some solid baseball discussions or maybe a lively insight into the gridiron battles I’d witnessed. Unfortunately, as is often the case…there was none to be had. This lead me down the dark, dark path that is the Singles and Dating Section or as Jackie refers to it the world’s renewable resource for constant entertainment.

I read some fine insight into the world of mating rituals among the twelve and thirteen-year old population of our country. Apparently the following are all signs of not only potential for courtship, but also true, undying, passionate love:

-Eye Contact
-Verbal Interaction
-Texting
-Insults
-Physical Abuse
-Blatant Commentary Regarding Disdain
-Instant Messaging
-Living in the Same Town
-Attending the Same Educational Institution
-Being an Ex
-Being Friends with an Ex
-Being the Ex of a Friend
-Being the Friend of an Ex’s Friend
-Being the Ex of a Friend’s Ex
-Pretty Much Any and All Combinations of the Words “Ex” and “Friend”
-Various Internet Jargon Including—but not limited to: ‘idk’ ‘lol’ ‘plz’ ‘wtf’ ‘bff’ etc…

At some point I’m pretty sure my brain gave up on me and I started to doze at my computer. It was then that I wandered over to the couch with the thought that I could wait out the storm of sleepiness until the game started…wrong.

I woke up with about 10 minutes of “Family Guy” left and Jackie giggling madly. Apparently I’d passed out during a commercial break and Jackie had swiped the remote. My 24 minutes of unconscious bliss had rejuvenated me…wrong, again…and I felt like I could do anything…wrong, yet again. Instead of doing anything…I did nothing and just sat on my ass and watched the Redskins steamroll the Giants. It was a rather sloppy game for both teams.

In fact, let me take a time out to make a comment. I thought about writing a blog about this while watching the game and I still might somewhere down the line—probably after the Giants get eliminated in their Wild Card game or something—but here’s the deal. Eli Manning flat-out sucks. I realize he’s clearly a decent quarterback to have made it into the NFL…but watching him play hurts my soul. He looks like a sad, lost little puppy that should be euthanized, he throws like that uncoordinated kid in your high-school gym class who wore his bathing shorts into the shower all the way through college and he does nothing but piss and moan after every play.

Anywho, as the game drew to a close it was nearing midnight and I figured it was finally time for bed. I sauntered into the bathroom and plucked out my contacts which—given that I’d drunkenly forgotten to take them out two nights before had been in since Friday morning—came out with ease. My eyeballs started throbbing. I didn’t know eyeballs could throb…they can. I’d like Bill Nye to explain that one. Then I wandered into bed and slipped under the covers and…beats me, I was out before I’d pulled the blankets up past my waist.

I woke up at 11am—not too shabby, but not the one or two in the afternoon I was gunning for. So I spent the morning toiling around the house with things like cleaning and vacuuming the living room, showering, shaving and attempting to nap. Unfortunately…I’m not much of a napper and all my napping efforts were in vain.

Eventually Jackie came home and was very much in favor of my plan to bring some pizza into the home. So I ventured out, ordered a large pepperoni pizza from the wonderful people at McGoo’s and a slice to bide my time. The dude then gave me the slice on the house because (and I quote)…“you’re a good customer, Boss.” Which means either I eat too much pizza or it was like a day and a half old or something. Either way, while I waited for the pizza I hit the dollar store and 7-11. At the dollar store I found the usual all-day chaos of people going absolutely ape-shit over shit that does not warrant any level of the “shit scale” let alone going all the way up the scale to “ape-shit”…I mean seriously.

However, when I got to 7-11 I noticed something that ranked well on the “shit scale.” It was a ginormous Rice Krispies Treat!! Now when I say ginormous, I f’n mean ginormous. Sure it’s not a word…but it’s what I mean and I know you’re feeling the vibe too. I intend to try and eat this bad-boy over the course of the overnight shift…although Rice Krispies Treats can be very deceiving. If it’s all light and fluffy—no probs. If it’s all thick and super sticky—mega probs!! Note: There will be pictures of this bad-boy posted in my most recent Facebook photo album – PHOTOLICIOUS VIII.

I spent the remainder of the day eating pizza, drinking caffeinated beverages and doing my best not to use up all the good internet—as to preserve some semblance of time killage for this overnight shift. On the way here I managed to catch a bus, which was intriguing to say the least. I got on the bus and it was just me, the very smiley man at the wheel and the unmistakably odiferous aroma of pot wafting through the bus. Thank God I tucked this acre of Rice Krispies Treat into my bag and out of sight!!

I then spent roughly 20 minutes stuck on the subway at Park Street. It was one of those fun situations where traffic is stopped at the station in either direction and the dude raining the train simply says “we’re going to be standing by for a few minutes” and then outside the car the subway dudes and chicks are freaking out. You have to wonder…is it a bomb threat? Did someone jump on the tracks? Is Carlos Santana in the car behind me? Am I wearing underwear? What type of underwear do you suppose Carlos Santana wears? (My bet is that he’s a boxers guy)

In the end, I received no answer to any of these questions (oh…except the underwear one…yes, yes I am)…

That pretty much brings us up to the present. I’m here. I’m at the desk. The library is pretty quiet. Much quieter than this time during the Sat/Sun shift and I’ve got two pounds worth of Rice Krispies and marshmallow taunting me.

…let the games begin.

Tuesday – 12:11am

So, some freaky nerd dude just asked about my Rice Krispies Treat. This isn’t a real big shocker, because come on…who wouldn’t ask about this thing. However, it got awkward really fast. Here’s the run-down:

*Freaky Nerd Dude sees Rice Krispies Treat behind the desk*
Freaky Nerd Dude: Is that a giant Rice Krispies Treat?
Captain Charisma: Why yes, yes it is.
Freaky Nerd Dude: Where do you find something like that?
Captain Charisma: At 7-11.
Freaky Nerd Dude: Really?
Captain Charisma: Yeppers…
Freaky Nerd Dude: Can I see it?
Captain Charisma: Um…sure?!
*Grabs it and holds it for him to see up-close*
Freaky Nerd Dude: No…I mean, can I hold it.
Captian Charisma: Um…sure?!
*Hands Freaky Nerd Dude the Rice Krispies Treat*
Captain Charisma: Pretty hefty Rice Krispy bar, huh?
Freaky Nerd Dude: Yeah…can I have it?
Captain Charisma: What?
Freaky Nerd Dude: Not like to eat, but to go show my friends.
Captain Charisma: Nah…I think I’ll hang onto it, they can see it when you guys leave.
Freaky Nerd Dude: Oh they’re not here.
Captain Charisma: Huh?!
Freaky Nerd Dude: They live in Boston.
*Note: Freaky Nerd Dude has been staring lustfully at the Krispy bar*
Captain Charisma: Riiiiiiight…I’m gonna need that back now.
*Forcibly removes Krispy bar from Freaky Nerd Dude’s hands*
Captain Charisma: Is there anything else I can help you with?
Freaky Nerd Dude: Not anymore…
* Freaky Nerd Dude sits at a computer and stares at me in between—what I’m assuming is—typing about me to his buddies.*

At this point, I’m just a little creeped out. I’m pretty sure that dude wanted to get busy with my Rice Krispies Treat. And although I’m a large proponent of people getting it on in the library and of nerds making progress into the sexual realm…there is still the one very awkward fact that Freaky Nerd Dude wanted to bang my midnight snack. This might require therapy…

Door Count – 12:30am – 38 People (40 less than Sat/Sun Night)

Tuesday – 12:45am

I’ve decided now is the time to rip into the Rice Krispies Treat, if for no better reason than to let Freaky Nerd Dude know that his potential bedmate is now off the market.

Tuesday – 12:53am

Okay…that’s weird. Apparently, all I had to do was start tearing into this brick of Krispy bar and Freaky Nerd Dude would have left like 45 minutes ago. As soon as I ripped into it like the ravenous wolverine that I am he just got up and left. That’s right Freaky Nerd Dude, this Krispy bar is spoken for!

Tuesday – 12:55am

Oh and it’s a thick, super-chewy, super-sticky brick-o-Krispy…which means this could be some slow going.

Tuesday – 1:14am

I forgot how much I actually liked the flavor of some energy drinks. I just had a Full Throttle; probably the first one I’ve had in like six or seven months and it rocked my world.

You see, most energy drinks have this weird super syrupy, super sweet acidic taste to them. It’s like a cross between Smarties candies and cough syrup. However, some of them are downright delicious. Rockstar set the bar with their Guava concoction, but then set it even higher with the new Rockstar Fruit Punch. That stuff is awesome. It tastes like Juicy-Juice, but with a serious kick in the ass.

Door Count – 1:30am – 29 People (12 less than Sat/Sun Night)

Tuesday – 1:42am

Maybe I shouldn’t have run Freaky Nerd Dude off by messing with his would-be maiden-conquest. Now that he’s gone things are pretty quiet. Tonight’s partner-in-crime, Jennifer is reading her book right now. The few people we have are scattered far-and-wide, mostly wide except for a dude in the study room (whom I’m sure you’ll be hearing about later) and this chick who’s passed out at one of the desks. Her iPod is sorta hanging there taunting me. I’ve already walked up to where she’s sleeping and put three “I Could Have Been a Thief” cards on her iPod. I’m pretty sure she’ll get the subtle-hint I’m leaving.

Tuesday – 2:06am

I’m just sitting here and I can’t help but think about how much I hated “Chairman of the Board.” F’n Carrot Top.

Tuesday – 2:19am

I feel like I’ve eaten a lot of this Rice Krispies Treat…no, no I haven’t. I’ve barely made a dent. Good thing Freaky Nerd Dude isn’t here. He’d probably give me some big speech about how he could treat my Rice Krispy bar better than I ever will and how he’d never nibble it and leave it alone. How he could makes all its dreams come true. No…no wait…I’m just channeling “Grey’s Anatomy” again. Why does that always happen to me?!

Door Count – 2:30am – 12 People (11 less than Sat/Sun Night)

Tuesday – 2:35am

Other Things I’ve Counted Thus Far…

-Empty Red Bull cans strewn about the library – 9
-Loose change I’ve found on campus since midnight – 23 cents
-Chicks in the library – 2
-Number of times the dude in the Study Room has farted because he errantly thinks it’s soundproof – 4
-Number of comments I’ve received about the Rice Krispies Treat – 7
-Conscious people in the library – 5

Tuesday – 2:42am

…Carlos Santana’s undwear?! What the hell?!

Tuesday – 2:58am

When I talk…I tend to be very animated. Like my hands are flailing to and fro and my using my whole body as one gigantic audio-visual enhancement device. That’s not too weird. Dare I say, it’s even quite common. Do most people may not do the Macarena when talking about the West Minster Kennel Club Dog Show…but whatevs…hand motions are quite common when talking.

Why am I ranting you ask? Well Fictional Reader I’m glad you asked. (Oh…at this point my Fictional Reader is being played by my current celeb crush of the moment, Miss Amy Adams of “Enchanted”…ironically enough as my F.R. she is currently wearing her princess gown from the aforementioned Disney blockbuster)

Well—my new ridiculously more attractive Fictional Reader—I’m ranting about my speaking habits and the add-on physical habits that accompany them because of this creepy dude who is doing all of the same things…but whilst reading from his laptop. He’s sitting alone in a nice, comfy chair and rather than reading like a normal person he’s flipping his hands in all directions like he’s Jackie Chan or something. Kinda freakin’ me out.

Tuesday – 3:16am

Ah yes, it has hit that point in the evening where suddenly it feels really cold in here. It is for this reason that I always wear long-sleeves when doing overnight shifts. I don’t know if it’s all mental or if the heat really dips in the middle of the night. Either way…it’s shiver time.

Tuesday – 3:21am

Not that I’m one to judge, but some chicka looks a bit like a mess right now. Her multi-colored hair is going off in all-kinds of different directions and is doing that whole poofy bed-head thing that people normally spend 45 minutes trying to duplicate post-shower, she’s in her jammies and socks and she’s sleepily wandering around the library…I’m going to assume in search of the potty. Although…GREAT NEWS…she’s not an idiot and she’s actually taking her laptop with her. Now that’s a smart gal…a freaky gal…but a smart one nonetheless.

Door Count – 3:30am – 12 People (2 less than Sat/Sun Night)

Tuesday – 3:48am

You know how you can tell a place is too quiet.

When some chick all the way at the other end of the library coughs under her breath, but it’s still enough to make the three dudes within eyeshot (Eyeshot?! Is that a thing?!) all look up and over in that general direction. That right there is when you know it’s too f’n quiet.

Tuesday – 4:02am

Things are rolling right along for the time being. Again, things are very, very, very quiet in here tonight. I think that after the 4:30 head count, I might do some shelving to keep the body moving. I feeling like I’m getting to the point where if I sit around I’ll start to get sleepy; which is by far the worst portion of the night. Regular sleepy sucks enough and super tired blows…but sitting = unconscious stage really sucks the llama’s gonads. Nothing worse than not being able to sit and read about baseball without finding your face planted on the keyboard and no recollection of how it got there.

Tuesday – 4:18am

One of my favorite parts of writing blogs is choosing the pictures that I put with them…for those of you reading this on MySpace you’re getting screwed, because I can’t ever get the photos to format, so all you get is text, sorry…as such, I just spent roughly fifteen minutes scouring the internet for nerd pictures.

As anyone who has read my blogs will tell you, I don’t like to reuse pictures. This is why if I write a blog about Johan Santana, there will always be a new picture of Johan Santana. No one wants a repeat. I’m not running an amateur hour here…when it comes to blogging (a legit verb and I don’t know why Word is disagreeing with me – f’n red squiggly underline drives me nuts) I’m all about keeping it fresh, both in text and in visual aids.

Tuesday – 4:26am

This Rice Krispy bar is kicking my ass. I greatly overvalued my ability to pack this thing away. I had intended to take photos to show my progression through the night, but at this juncture I can only assume it would be embarrassing for me and my family…and I’d prefer not to be disowned just before the holidays.

Door Count – 4:30am – 9 People (2 less than Sat/Sun Night)

Tuesday – 4:34am

You know…while I was making the rounds and counting heads it dawned on me, this is one really scary f’n library.

I was in the basement and the janitorial staff had apparently unlocked a door to get to the document services office…and had forgotten to close it all the way (or any of the subsequent doors beyond it) and while I was walking I heard all-kinds of crazy rustling sounds and what sounded like howling. As one might expect a brotha to do when he hears those sounds at 4:30 in the morning in abandoned basement of a desolate, barren library…I squeaked like a field-mouse and started to bolt. Then I remembered that in addition to the fact that I’m (allegedly) a grown-up at the ripe-old age of 24, I’m also a big manly dude with a reputation to protect.

Okay that last part is a bit of a stretch…but you get the drift.

So I wander up to the door and kick it in, under the assumption that if there’s an axe-wielding maniac on the other side of it that’ll knock him down long enough for me do the one thing no one in a horror movie ever does correctly…GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE. Luckily, there was no one there and all I’d done is bang the door up against some filing cabinets or something. Whatevs…it’ll be our little secret.

That was when I noticed all of the other doors were still open and/or unlocked as well. So I fixed that little problem before thinking to myself…what if it’s not an axe-wielding maniac that’s hanging out back here, but rather it’s a ghost. Some kind of pissed off poltergeist who blew his brains out in the basement of library when he got his first A- and didn’t know how to cope. Just as that thought was entering my mind…a whole stack of papers blew around and I freaked and ran like a small, frightened dog with my tail between my legs all the way back upstairs to the circulation desk.

Call me crazy, but even with overtime…I ain’t getting paid enough to fight ghosts!!

…at least not alone. No, if I’m going to fight a ghost, I’m going to give my boys a jingle and we’ll do it like we used to back in the ‘80s.

Tuesday – 4:42am

Okay…now Homie’s getting pretty bored. I think I’m going to go do me some shelving of the all-important books. I’ll check in with you peeps at the next head count.

Door Count – 5:30am – 4 People (1 MORE than Sat/Sun Night)

Tuesday – 5:38am

And just like that we’ve hit the dwindling point in the evening/morning. Four people – two asleep. There was, however, a table-full of my pet peeve sitting upstairs. What’s my pet peeve you ask Fictional Reader? (Now my Fictional Reader is Sylvester Stallone in Rocky IV…but only during the training montage…oh and he’s wearing a pair of green and orange zebra-striped Zubaz pants) Well F.R., since you asked so nicely…I’ll let you in on this pet peeve. You see it really bothers me when people are stupid with their things; especially when their things cost a lot of money.

Case in point: upstairs right now is a table that has an expensive laptop, two flashdrives, a cell-phone, a bunch of text books and a case of Red Bull…all just sitting there for the taking. In fact, the dumb-ass who left all of their belongings was also nice enough to leave their bag, thus giving any and all potential thieves an easy way to carry off the aforementioned belongings with much easy and little suspicion.

I guess I just don’t get how someone can be so stupid. Maybe they think I’m here to play babysitter to their shit, but it turns out, I’m not. I don’t know who’s got what, especially not if they’re sitting upstairs. Furthermore, I really don’t give a gigantic, amphibious rat’s ass if their shit gets stolen if they’re going to be so stupid about it. If someone walks past me with a laptop, I’m going to assume it’s theirs. I’m not going to stop them and ask for proof…so if anyone is reading this now and you want a laptop…there’s a good chance it’s still there. Come on over and swipe that sumbitch.

Tuesday – 5:56am

I wonder if Grace is still up writing her paper?
I wonder if Jackie is still reading Yahoo Answers?
I wonder if anyone would notice if I took that laptop and slipped out the backdoor to my cube, tucked it safely in my desk and then came back all under the guise of a prolonged, Rice Krispies Treat-related restroom visit?
I wonder why the same guy has called three times to ask if we were still open so he could come check out a book?

Tuesday – 6:13am

Two new people have just entered the library. All hell is officially breaking loose as we drawer nearer to the second-to-last head count of the night/morning. I don’t know about all-you-all, but I’m getting pretty pumped. Granted once this shift is over, instead of going home and passing out like I think I’m REALLY going to want to do…I get to go work a nine hour day. Pffffffft. Csssssssst. Whatevs…I’ll be good to go.

Tuesday – 6:27am

Just wrote a new Top Five People I Hate Right Now blog; one of my favorites to write. I’ll let all-you-all guess who’s at the top. It’s a really big surprise. Oh look at that…the sun is starting to come up. Nice.

Door Count – 6:30am – 4 People (2 MORE than Sat/Sun Night)

Tuesday – 6:40am

Just to make a note, Ms. Laura McWilliams (she of Saturday’s encounter with the amphibious rat) is at work. Perhaps she does not have a working clock or perhaps she doesn’t believe in daylight savings time and, as such, is under the guise that it is currently 7:40…which would still make her an hour and twenty minutes early. Well the sun is roughly 1/3 of the way up now, perhaps she is the owner of a rooster with better than 20/20 vision?! That would make for a solid explanation, right?!

Tuesday – 6:54am

Alrighty, ladies and gentlemen…I’m breaking down now. It’s time for me to bust out my secondary energy drink. I’d also like to take this moment to admit an overwhelming defeat to the Super Rice Krispies Treat. That hunk-o-Krispy is far more than I could handle. I may have to get a team of people together to take this thing down. Or I could just try to hunt down Freaky Nerd Dude and let him have his moment of coitial bliss with the aforementioned interest of his desires…nah.

Tuesday – 7:14am

http://www.adultswim.com/video/?episodeID=8a25c39215d7c8da0115d8eecdee023c

TeeHee TeeHee

Tuesday – 7:19am

The phone just rang.

I think I peed my pants.

Needless to say, it caught me a little off-guard. :-/

Door Count – 7:30am – 12 People (11 MORE than Sat/Sun Night)

Tuesday – 7:40am

I’ve gotta be honest, I’m quite impressed with how untired I am. Given that I was up for 41 hours and then slept for like 11 hours, bouncing right back and pulling another all-nighter followed by a dayshift should be more of a struggle, but I think I’m going to be okay. Sure that might be a bit presumptuous given how quickly a crash can come on…but whatevs, I’m riding the wave now.

Tuesday – 7:42am

Soooo tiiiiirrrred!!

…just kidding.

Tuesday – 7:48am

Jennifer has left the building. She was a fine overnight tag-team partner and I wish her many bountiful hours of slumber. It is time for me to gather my things, wait for the okay from Dan and then wander over to Barker where I can proceed to spend the first half-hour or so of my day working on posting this guy on all my blogs. Aw yeah!

Tuesday – 8:00am

Graves, out!


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